CIA begins recruiting new intake of future enemies

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bobret the hobret
Posts: 3251
Joined: Mon Jul 08, 2002 8:15 pm


old but good :)


http://www.chaser.com.au/index.php?opti ... &Itemid=26



Edition 66] LANGLEY, Friday: CIA Director George Tenet announced today that the agency has begun recruiting future enemies for the year 2014. The CIA is looking to recruit foreign nationals who are currently members of small paramilitary organisations which are no threat to the United States.

It will offer them extensive training and millions of dollars worth of high-tech weapons systems in return for a promise to develop their organisation into a full-blown terrorist organisation capable of attacking the United States in the agreed year 2014. The attack would then be used by the Pentagon to argue for maintaining the current military budget for another year.

Tenet stressed the Agency is an equal opportunity employer. "We're looking to welcome people from all backgrounds into our programme," he said. "Though we've obviously had most success with fundamentalist Muslims like Osama Bin Laden in recent years, who can say who the terrorist threats of tomorrow may be?"

Tenet listed Algerian nationalists, the Basque separatists operating in Spain, Somali warlords, Kurdish groups in Turkey and even the IRA as groups that would be capable of developing into a credible threat against the US if given access to state-of-the-art training and equipment.

The CIA confirmed it will also be continuing its special-entry recruiting programme for dictators in rogue states. The agency has been widely praised by Bush insiders for giving Saddam Hussein so many weapons to fight Iran in the 1980s that even the massive bombardment during the Gulf War wasn't able to destroy all of the American-manufactured weapons of mass destruction that are now justifying a second attack on the impoverished nation.

"If we can convince the world that Iraq is a credible threat to US security, we can build up pretty much anyone," Tenet explained. It is widely believed that recent recruits to this elite programme include the Sultan of Brunei and Prince Rainier of Monaco.

Tenet said he was looking forward to personally greeting the new recruits when they arrived secretly in Langley to sign their under-the-table deals.

"Now that the Cold War's over, it's really tough to develop enough threats to justify maintaining the military-industrial complex," he said. "That's why we're so eager to welcome new potential enemies into the CIA programme. Future enemies, come and talk to us, because we can't do this alone."

 

rolly
Posts: 280
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2005 4:01 pm


Shit Yeah! Where do I sign up? Think of all the goochey gear one will be getting! Awesome :twisted: And like get to use it, and anywhere I'd like be associating with big wigs and be amune from legal action till the reqired date and time for the major plan! This beats being stuck in a office all day. I've already got my target in mind, hopfull the administration will approve, this would be fun. Also know of an international network of people in existance which will work well as a cover for such a wanted organiasation. Where do I sign...?

 

B-RAVE
Posts: 76
Joined: Wed Mar 22, 2006 6:19 pm


ME AND MY BROS FACE THIS SHIT ALL THE TIME,

THE SPOOKS AND ASIO FIENDS ON THE INTEL MINE,

TAKING OUR PICTURES AND PROFILING OUR RACE,

MY GOD THEY TAKE MY PIC BECAUSE OF THE LOOK OF MY FACE ?

THESE CIA MOFOS ARE JUST BEGGIN FOR SOME TROUBLE,

WORD TO THEIR MOTHERS WHEN THEY DIG THROUGH THA RUBBLE,

THIS ISN'T PRETTY, IT'S NOT A DESIREABLE SITCH,

WHEN WE MAKE THE NEXT TWIN TOWERS, WHO WILL YOU BE CALLING, BITCH ?

 

phoney
Posts: 1279
Joined: Wed Jun 11, 2003 4:46 pm


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